1. |
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I cannot stop moving (muscles will atrophy). Peeking in the cars on the Taconic as they're passing me. Looking for would-be lovers at the stoplights, frantic. No familiar faces, still I keep driving (hopeless romantic). But what would I do if I saw you idling there? I'd probably look straight on, roll up my window, blast my Zeppelin, pretend I didn't care. Baptized in the backyard river, forgiveness comes the more I swim. One last fleeting thought I swear. I'll be absolved of all my sins. I wish that I could be my own Messiah, a savior for no one but me. Am I damned and doomed to burn in Hellfire for my hubris, my stubborn vanity? I've tried doing that, but you cannot win alone. I just don't understand how someone comes along, you like them, and they become your home.
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2. |
Never Said (demo) (2020)
01:15
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I never meant to say I'm sorry. I avoided it but I'm sorry. I never said I was right. I just felt it but I was wrong. I never tried to make up for the ways I hurt you. Here I am now
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3. |
Religio (demo) (2020)
03:27
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Old friend cross the way, waving out windows, wishing he could say "Come out your home." Critters on the lawn, throwing parties cause all the children gone, but some day soon. The lives we had before.....when it's over, I won't complain no more. I take it back. Stretch and count to ten. Get up early then do it all again. It's our religio.
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4. |
N.Y.E. (demo) (2020)
08:11
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every day i wake up. i feel brand new. then i crawl into bed. tired and used. some stones are smooth. cause theyre worn down. its what i get. for sticking around. you know youre lonely when. the barbers razor grazing your ear. is the most intimate thing that happens to you all year. i dont count strangers. and no more exes only friends. its almost 2020 this extra shit must end. too many spills. not enough rags. too much baggage. not enough bags. some stones are smooth. cause theyre worn down. its what i get. for sticking around. you know youre lonely when. the barbers razor grazing your ear. is the most intimate thing that happens to you all year. i dont count strangers. and no more exes only friends. its almost 2020 this extra shit must end. //// my gramma spoke. to god for me. she said that i was in good hands. i have a problem trusting strangers. so ill take her word though i've never met this man \\\\\ yeah this so called god guy. he better do it all right. cause ive been living too long without. seeing no light. yeah the old days are over. finish what i start. ill infect your mind then ill. steal your heart. here come the blues i wont cry ill just kick off my shoes. trying to be stronger than a random piece of bad news. one day ill laugh at when. the barbers razor grazing my ear. was the most intimate thing that happened to me all year. i wont count strangers. and no more exes only friends. its already 2020 this extra shits gotta end.
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5. |
Thunder (2019)
06:08
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I am guilty of sitting in this room squandering all my space to move, saying I'm trapped. And I will tell you that I am feeling lost even if you pointed out my star on a map. What a curious thing...I've made a blunder. Without know it I have stolen my own thunder. I'm afraid to let you all in close so please don't go away or I will cry. I do not see a love in any present future but I still need you here and I don't know why. Stay away from me...It's no wonder. Come any closer I'll steal your thunder. I've never been good at outsmarting my own mind, but every day is a lesson in learning to be kind. So I'll here, watch the storms roll in across the empty plains and take some comfort in listening to the thunder as it rains. These days I sit in the hall, as if in a crystal ball, screaming "Mirror on the wall! Where do I go?" I'm quite taken aback and my jaw starts to slack when the mirror answers back, "How should I know??" No more answers, only questions from these strange and wild projections pointing in all four directions as if I'll grow wise. I do my best to read the room but then I see that it's past noon and i run off to my doom but I still wonder why. Won't you answer me! Plans blown asunder. Nothing to do but roll...roll on with the thunder.
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6. |
The Circle (2019)
04:17
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Every time a friend dies the grown ups say you're handling this so well. When inside everything's on fire. I want to tell them all to go to Hell cause the truth is, I feel guilty. As time goes on the wounds scab over fast. I feel like if I'd truly loved them, the pain wouldn't get easier; it would last. And I know if they could hear me, they'd say "Silly child, there's no right or wrong" so sing us a song to move us along cause love is the one thing that stays behind when we're gone. Every time a friend dies, the world comes close together for a time. Maybe it's to fill the empty space....the empty space our dear friend left behind. And then it happens very naturally, the circle slowly opens up wide to make room for more new friends to love, as we hasten to remember those who've died. And I know if they could hear me, they'd say "Silly child there's no right or wrong" so sing us a song to move us along cause love is the one thing that stays behind when we're gone.
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7. |
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Tripping into nighttime, stumble out of slumber, roll out of bed
All the music you meant to write is pounding in your head
Left foot, right foot, down the hallway
Walk too fast. You're nauseated
Player one is sent back to start
Overstimulated eyes can't tell the colors apart
But somewhere things are different
Closer than you know
Cause in the garden there are flowers
That we planted seed by seed
Some grow tall to kiss the sunlight
Some are choking on the weeds
But for the sake of fallen petals
Burn the beds we must not do
Save the strongest for the harvest
I give the beauty unto you
From the foggy gloom
Comes morning's bloom
Through winter's doom
We'll all be sprouting soon
Falling into winter, ploughing into springtime, nothing is new
All the sights that you've never seen play like a movie only for you
Left foot right foot up the driveway
Walk too fast. You're nauseated
Protagonist exits stage right
Overstimulated mind can't tell daylight apart from the night
But somewhere things are different
Closer than you know
Cause in the garden there are flowers
That we planted one by one
Some grow hiding in the shadows
Some grow tall to kiss the sun
But for the sake of twisted petals
Burn the beds we must not do
Save the strongest for the harvest
I give the beauty unto you
From the foggy gloom
Comes morning's bloom
Through winter's doom
We'll all be sprouting soon
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8. |
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Looking for love on an empty Saturday night
She's in the room but somehow out of sight
He's in her arms but he feels so alone
He’d reach her better on the telephone
He’s at the door, no one’s answering but somebody’s home
Where did he go wrong in trying to love her
Was it his fault for trying to care
Tired of love on a quiet Saturday night
Too many ghosts got her feeling uptight
No room to move in a bed so small
No room to grow with her dreams so tall
Feeling guilty for not wanting to see him at all
Was it her fault for wanting more
Was it her fault for moving on
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9. |
Arboretum (2017)
03:11
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For Scott
There was a package on my doorstep
The day I came home from
Living overseas
Inside a letter with some words on
Taking care of
Different kinds of trees
And two bags of seeds
Still alive
I'll carry them
Till I find the place I'll spend my life
And when I find that house I will
Plant those seeds
They will grow strong and become my
Japanese Maple trees
Their roots will grow into the soil
For centuries to come
I cannot wait to start my
Arboretum
It started out when I first sang you
The chorus from that
Simon and Garfunkel song
We went our separate ways but
Correspondence kept on
Going on for five years strong
No distance too great
To send some words
When I settle down, I know what I'll do first
When i find that house I will
Plant those seeds
They will grow strong and become my
Japanese Maple trees
Their roots will grow into the soil
For centuries to come
I cannot wait to start my
Arboretum
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10. |
Juntos (Together) (2016)
04:23
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Eu falo
A verdade enquanto
Eu caminho
Nesta cidade
Juntos
Nós mudamos mas
Nossos corações permanecem
Calmamente
Você me beija enquanto
Nós dividimos uma cerveja
Juntos
Nós ficamos bebados mas
Nossos corações permanecem
Eu susurro
Tres palavras enquanto
Você dorme em suas calças
Os estações
Eles mudam rapidamente mas
Nossos corações permanecem
[[[ENGLISH]]]
I speak the truth while I walk in this city. Together, we change but our hearts stay the same//Calmy, you kiss me while we share a beer. Together, we change while our hearts stay the same//I whisper three words while you sleep in your jeans. The seasons--they change but our hearts stay the same
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11. |
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Aquí, junto al mar latino,
digo la verdad:
siento en roca, aceite y vino,
yo mi antigüedad.
¡Oh, qué anciano soy, Dios santo,
oh, qué anciano soy!...
¿De dónde viene mi canto?
Y yo, ¿adónde voy?
El conocerme a mí mismo
ya me va costando
muchos momentos de abismo
y el cómo y el cuándo...
Y esta claridad latina,
¿de qué me sirvió
a la entrada de la mina
del yo y el no yo?...
Nefelibata contento,
creo interpretar
las confidencias del viento,
la tierra y el mar...
Unas vagas confidencias
del ser y el no ser,
y fragmentos de conciencias
de ahora y de ayer.
Como en medio de un desierto
me puse a clamar;
y miré el sol como un muerto
y me eché a llorar.
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12. |
10 Year Reunion (2015)
03:48
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hello hello
im out of my head
last time i saw you
we were so torn up our eyes were red
and now we're here
i don't remember your name
cause after 3 beers
it's ok cause everyone looks the same
do you drive home at night
do you measure your trip by the streetlights
home is when the numbers stop
and it starts out from the top
hello hello
it's been quite a night
last time i saw you
we were all dressed up in black and white
and now we're here
i can't remember your name
cause after 10 years
it's ok cause no one looks the same
time goes on, we grew up
we outgrew the shoulders that carried us
travel safe, hope you're well
next time i'll see you in hell
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13. |
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It's been a long, long time
Since I've memorized your face
It's been four hours now
Since I've wandered through your place
And when I sleep on your couch
I feel very safe
And when you bring the blankets
I cover up my face
I do
Love you
I do
Love you
And when you play guitar
I listen to the strings buzz
The metal vibrates underneath your fingers
And when you crochet
I feel mesmerized and proud
And I would say I love you
But saying it out loud is hard
So I won't say it at all
And I won't stay very long
But you are life I needed all along
I think of you as my brother
Although that sounds dumb
And words are futile devices
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14. |
Citrus (2015)
04:12
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Thursday is the longest day
Cause it feels like a Friday but it's not
And October is the best month
Cause the trees are red and yellow
And the days are not too hot
So to put it quite simply
You're the fall to my summer and the end to my week
It's been ages since I've seen you
But I read your backlit words
Try to recall how you sound when you speak
Lemon candy's sweeter
Cause the sugar makes the bitterness worth it all in the end
And I do my work in pencil
So if I mess up I can fix it
You can't do that with a pen
Now if I may interpret
You're the citrus to my sucker and the white-out to my quill
And it keeps me up at night sometimes
To think about your laughter
and the way you could never sit still
"I give you permission to break my things
Sweep the mess into the corner and blame the whole damn thing on me"
And I know that sounds like gibberish
But the words are all your own
I stole them from your Twitter history
So I guess what I'm trying to say is
I'm just floating through the air whenever you come around
Cause my head's up in the stratosphere
And you've gone and swept my feet
Clear off the ground
Who let all the time elapse?
We're a quarter decade older but none the wiser sad to say
Cause you still make me laugh real hard
With just some words in LED
from several hundred miles away
So at the risk of sounding forward
I've never met a soul like yours who does exactly what you do
And I'm a sucker for an optimist
Cause the sunny days are brighter
and the cloudy ones have light all thanks to you.
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15. |
Open Letter (2015)
02:12
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i'm sorry i got your hopes up. i thought i'd be happy too but i know we wouldn't be here If I had listened to you. all those nights you sat by my bedside and said what a woman should be...well I'm trying, Mama I'm trying. i hope you're still proud of me cause I can hum through my nose, i can touch all of my toes. i got an A on a paper last week and when i come home, I won't leave you alone
I'll do the dishes for the week
I will sweep all of the bedrooms
I'll make you food and make you smile
You can tell me all your woes while I wash your dirty clothes
If you let me stay a while
I'm sorry I wasn't honest
With myself or mom or you
And I sorry I am distant
When there's nothing I'm working through
All those car rides that we went on
When you shared your heart with me
Well I'm trying, Papa I trying
To hear your sermons earnestly
Cause you were right, you were wise and when I close my tired eyes
I can see you sitting there
On the porch in the rain, singing all your old refrains
As you braid my summer hair
I will laugh at all your jokes
Make sure you never felt alone
And this will be so easy
When I make my way back home
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16. |
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While you were sleeping, I turned the lights out. Was the kitchen cold? Did you hear their voices like I did? While we sat shiva, you held our shoulders like my mother held mine. Empty halls and holy walls don't hold a home together, don't hold a home together. When a word means too much, you don't speak it anymore. You don't speak it anymore. You tuck it away behind the books on the shelf, and no one says it, and no one asks why it's there. And no one remembers why it's there. Don't forget. Don't forget. While you were weeping, I held your hand. While you were weeping, I held your hand. I heard you sigh, heard you suck in your breath, but don't you still fear death? Why don't you laugh now? I do.
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17. |
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I hope you spend your days
writing verses on your page.
May your life be a Walden Pond swim.
Taking showers in the cold
and your glasses filled to their brim.
And I hope you treat your heart
real nice and real smart.
May your life be a Walden Pond swim.
Can't be worthless seein' stars,
buying rocky-road for me and him.
Stay in that water and
keep where you're feeling fine but
I'm just the daughter of a man who lives on oak and wine and I
swim like my father
and remember hard days drivin' miles across county lines.
I hope you realize
why the clouds are always crying.
May your life be a Walden Pond dive.
Shaking flowers at the ground
while you live the life you did at five.
And I hope it's testified
for you the best had been denied.
May your life be a Walden Pond swim.
May you find your love tonight
and the times you have are never grim.
Stay in that water and
keep where you're feeling fine but
I'm just the daughter of a man who lives on oak and wine and I
swim like my father and remember hard days drivin' miles across county lines.
I've still got those pictures that I found in a bucket.
They're all up on my wall.
And I've still got those paintings that you did for my birthday
way back in the fall.
And I've still got those pictures that i found in a bucket.
They're all up on my wall.
And I've still got those paintings that you did for my birthday
way back in the fall.
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Sem Ortiz Chestertown, Maryland
All songs written & recorded / cobbled together in my apartment unless otherwise noted.
Email: workfia95@gmail.com
Instagram:
@bluhoopz
@workfia
If you like Sem Ortiz, you may also like:
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